What should I do? I can't live without him but he's playing with me...?

Me and my ex are 'bffl's' according to him. The problem is i still love him..ok i guess i should slow down. We've been on and off for months. He plays this game where he's all like 'I love you, no joke' then 2 weeks later hes talking about how he wants to take a break because we're 'not a good match', 'im too attached' and how he likes someone else..that someone else is my ex best friend Maranda. She's gorgeous but a fake slut! She lies and shes so ******* obnoxious. I know that she doesn't deserve him cause she tells me all this **** about how he's ' ugly' and that she doesn't like him.. except the day before he dumped me they were all over each other..and she told my best friend Taylor that they 'might go out' on the phone 2 days after he dumped me for the THIRD time. I've been hurt so many times and i really do love him. He's my forth boyfriend and i've had year relationships but i've never felt this way...what should i do? I know in my heart i can't take him back cause he's playing this game..but i don't know. (I asked this question a few minutes ago but i need to add something) I CAN'T let him go. You don't understand, i believe in myself but its fricking HARD. I've puked the night before he dumped me for the 3rd time..a week ago. and I also puked when, two days later when she was still my friend, Maranda slept over and he kept calling me and asking to talk to her and she was talking about her *** and flirting and everything..and i went to the kitchen, puked in the sink, and before we were in my room and having a heart to heart, i was crying, mascara running down my face, and before we went to bed she said to him 'You need to stop liking me because my friend is like, breaking down and you don't even care' and he was just like 'Okay? Well let me talk to her' and i calmed myself down and barely talked to him, just listened. He's all like 'I'm sorry!' and stuff but i think he was just saying that cause his slut was there....i dont even know. I don't have the strength to let him go! I've never breaking down for a guy before, or puked!! This is serious.. I'm playing hard to get and stuff cause i know hes immature and doesn't want a serious relationship. Believe me, I know but i can't just be 'bffl's' without breaking down........I need him, he's everything to me. I know he still cares about me because the day he broke up with me hes like in a text 'i still like you 5/10' and stuff but the next day we went skating and of course, who showed up? MARANDA. Yay... shes such a lying skank. Patrick(HIS NAME) always calls me especially with his friends just to scream and be obnoxious with his friends. Like, his friend Lucas who i sorta like left 2 messages on my cell. 'Patrick said if you shave your uni-brow and get a better personality you might have a shot.' and ****. 1. I DON'T HAVE A ******* UNI BROW. There is no hair between my eyebrows. And 2. That's ******* rude and i went off on his phone like telling him what a fake he is, and that i know he's just trying to be cool for his friends and **** but he said he never did that and that lucas had to hold his phone cause he had no pockets and they were playing manhunt...I believed him and now we talk like 'friends' this all happened over break(2 weeks) so i don't have a clue what to do? If you're just going to tell me what an hole he is and how i deserve better and have to let him go and crap, i know. I know but i still can't let him go...advice? If you read this whole thing- thanks. :]] <3